change, Connection, Inner child, life, musings, philosophy, rebirth, relationships, spirituality, Trauma

FEAR OF LIFE.

She was petrified.
Petrified of getting it right.
Petrified of getting it wrong.
Petrified of messing it all up.
A small girl trapped in an adults reality.
So she pushed and pulled.
Wanted then didn’t want.
Believed then didn’t believe.
She broke.
She broke herself in two.
She kicked.
She screamed.
She cried.
She shook.
She lay still.
Not knowing why.
Confused to why.
Confused to what she wanted.
Not because she didn’t know.
She was scared she’d not be enough.
She wouldn’t be met.
She wouldn’t be seen.
She wouldn’t be heard.
That she’d have to do more, be more, have more.
She went away for a little while.
Stepped away.
From the noise.
Not to push or pull.
Not to control anything.
Not to hide.
She pulled away for her.
To find herself.
In a noisy world.
A world filled with;
Distraction.
Opinions.
Demands.
Noise.
Desire.
Attachments.
Adoration.
She had to pull away.
She had to be fully there for herself.
To know her true self.
To get to know herself so very deeply.
She saw herself, truly saw herself.
She can see you.
All of you.
She can hear you.
All of you.
Everyone she knew.
From her children, parents, friends, all.
To you reading this.
Accepting all as they are.
Including herself.
Needing nothing in return.
As she had herself.
Held herself.
As all of herself.
Everything yet nothing.
Nothing yet everything.
She trusts herself now.
She truly needed that.
Now she can trust life too.