I have no idea where my life is taking me.
Day by day, hour by hour, minute by minute.
I find this mystery exhilarating, shaky, untouchable yet very grounding in its presence.
The numbness of my love life or lack of.
Or the lively breathing life of vastness that I had not yet discovered as I was seeing it in the olden days and ways.
Words spoken in a different form, pictures joining the dots into a journey.
The signs, synchronicities ravaging my mind as I could not believe in its presentation.
Searching for the thing that already existed.
Fear singing my song.
The fear of not being enough or may be too much playing it’s bitter, sweet song.
The raw, trembling shaky ground shaken by my own very legs as they purge their desires and fears into Mother Earth every time you enter my mind.
I am petrified to have faith in this being real as than I have to admit I’m scared.
I look into my own very eyes, through you, as you in through my minds eye and say to you; Beloved other I am scared yet I am also willing to step into whatever this may or may not be.
I feel I already have been dancing, leaning into your depth and feeling all of you.
I asked to learn about you, I never expected it to take form in the way it has.
A beautiful dance of frustration, fear, longing, purging and presence.
Beauty, rawness and colour.
Captivated by all of you, darkness, light and all inbetween.
As faith takes the lead, I take each breath one step at a time.
I’m here dear one.
I know you see me now.
Here, there, nowhere yet everywhere.
I don’t want an illusion, a fairy tale.
I breath life in, out, through and of all.
We may meet yet maybe we won’t.
Only God knows, as it’s vastness.
Fire and ice.
Do you feel me yet.

Bec Hart.

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